Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The problem with frozen yogurt is that it`s not ice cream.
People who live in glass houses must have to clean up a lot of dead birds.
I`m pretty sure my guardian angel just sits there watching me suffer, while rolling her eyes and painting her nails.
If you don`t have anything nice to say I would probably enjoy spending time with you
You ever wonder why it`s only women who need exorcisms?
If you allow your pets to roam free in our neighborhood, I’m gonna put party hats on em. This is non-negotiable.
Another day, another chance to make someone say, "Oh, now that`s just WRONG"...
One day we the women will rap the men lets see how they like it!
Of all the lies I`ve told in my life, "Just kidding" is my favorite.
You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there’s a luxury tax and rich people can go to jail.
Do good masochists go to heaven, or hell?
If God didn`t want us to eat Animals he wouldn`t made them out of meat.
You know you had an awesome night when you need sunglasses to get food out the fridge.
Milk Duds: When you want some candy but also crave a dislocated jaw
Well, if you`re going to question my reputation and credentials as a gynecologist,I suggest you get the hell out of my office van.