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Redneck Word : debate...i was gonna go fishin today but forgot to bring debate
I have no fear of heights. I do, however have a fear of falling from heights.
I`ve got good news and bad news. The good news is this status is almost over. The bad news is you read the whole thing.
If you were born in September, it`s pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a BANG
WOW! This gym thing is a lot harder than it looked on Instagram.
As your best friend, I swear to always pretend to be your lesbian lover when you are getting hit on by an ulgy ass hole in a bar.
This weekends forecast shows a 0% chance of cooking or cleaning, with a good chance of laying around in my pajamas.
My neighbour has diabetes and now she won`t make me cupcakes anymore, its like bad things always happen to me.
there is no strong beer, only weak men
Depending on how you look at it, half of 8 could be 4, 3, or 0.
Mister Rogers didn`t adequately prepare me for the people in my neighborhood.
Over 400 billion people a year are victims of exaggerated statistics.
I just discovered my oven CAN CLEAN ITSELF! Naturally I will be searching my apartment looking for similar buttons.
a lady at the grocery store asked me, "How do I know you?"...to which I replied, "You must watch a lot of porn".
"Love your friends, Not their sisters." & "Love your sisters, Not their friends." -By Mummy...