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Our office just got a new conference table. It sleeps 20.
This nude beach would be great!...if I wasn`t the only one participating.
Boobs, because you can`t motorboat a personality.
Despite the old saying, "Don`t take your troubles to bed", many women still sleep with their husbands.
The number one reason why trick or treating is better than sex is, you can do the whole neighborhood.
I know exactly how a bomb technician feels when I try to open a cup of cherry mixed fruit without the juice spraying out.
Scientist Proved That There are more Than 124786534688644478 People Living In This world who are Too Lazy To Read The Above Number...!!!
I stopped going to AA because all of their stories were about how they hit rock bottom by waking up next to me.
lord, we beg you for tupac, and in return you can have justin bieber
I`m currently writing a book about my love of dogs and gardening. It`s called b*tches and hoes
How to Train Your Dragon offers no practical dragon training information. NONE. Zero stars.
If by cat person you mean I like to sleep all day and poo in sand then yes I am a cat person.
I`m convinced girls only want one thing from guys... all of our hoodies. -Bfanch
what do you mean booze ain`t food!?
My reaction to stepping in dog sh!t is identical to me logging onto Facebook