Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I want rich people problems. Like where to park my yacht.
I like restaurants because the people have to be nice and feed you.
Shouldn`t there have been one scene in The Karate Kid where Daniel`s mom was like "Why are you constantly in that old man`s shed?"
One minute without you feels like 60 seconds.
I wonder if people without dogs actually pick food off the floor?
There comes a time in the day, when no matter what the question, the answer is booze.
Auctioneers are proof white guys could rap if they tried hard enough.
Nuclear physicists can be lots of fun. They`re often referred to as the half life of any party.
The other day my son asked me who picks up the seeing eye dog`s poop.
A shark will only attack you if you’re wet.
The Fourth of July was an annual reminder of how useless my dog would be in a war.?
Porn is the one industry where segregating races, genders, sexual preference, is completely acceptable
I just googled Magnum condoms and I swear I could hear Siri laughing.
Whenever somebody is murdered, the 1st person the police investigae is the spouse. That should tell you all you need to know about marriage.
Idiots are fun, no wonder every village has one.