Daily Silly Status

I always say, "morning." Instead of, "good morning." If it were a good morning, I would still be asleep in bed instead of talking to people.

I hate it when I`m in a crowded elevator and yell out "GROUP HUG!" and people look at me all weird and stuff.. Making friends is hard.

I can take care of my drunk friends, so the responsibility of having children doesn`t worry me.

Marijuana is a type of flower, therefore I am a florist not a drug dealer :p

I would’ve slept my way to the top years ago if it actually involved sleeping.

I have a moderate amount of skills in life, but one of those things does NOT include the ability to stop eating.

The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase Regards again.

I work so hard for my gta V character to have a better life

I would unblock you but then I`d be admitting I`d made a mistake and that`s just not my thing.

My best stories always end with the words ... "and then I got the hell out of there."

Why is it when you take a break from Facebook everyone assumes you`re happy and in love ... Maybe I was in jail.

I wouldn`t want to fly Virgin. Who`d want to fly an airline that doesn`t go all the way?

I have no time or patience for games in my relationships. Unless by “games” you’re referring to naked Twister. I can make time for that.

I don`t get my neighbor. tells me to make my self at home but then gets pissed off when they come into the kitchen and I`m in my underwear making a sandwich.

You know that button in the elevator with the fireman´s hat on it... turns out that is not the button you press to get a fireman´s hat.