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Don`t worry. Your secret is safe with me. I wasn`t listening anyway.
Don`t exercise ... fat people are harder to kidnap
I`m 5`5" and a HALF. I think men should be pretty impressed that I consider half inches very important when measuring things.
Statistics show that 3 out of 5 people.. aren`t the other 2.
Ever since I heard that women have one breast bigger than the other,it`s given me another reason to stare.
My wife made me coffee this morning & winked at me when she handed me the cup. I`ve never been more scared of a drink in all my life.
Facebook needs a "settle down" button.. You tap on a friend`s profile, that locks them out for a day so they can work through stuff privately..
Just took a shower. You have no idea how hard it was to sneak that thing out of Home Depot.
The iPhone 6 looks pretty cool, but it still lets people leave voicemails, so they apparently haven`t worked out all the bugs yet.
Is professional lollygagger an actual job yet?
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
You could pleasure me just by walking away.
I dont think I could ever stab someone.. I barely can get the straw into a Capri Sun.
roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at poems.. you have nice boobs
I wonder if I could get a job as a babysitter if I referenced my Facebook group admin experience.