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Can anyone recommend a good movie to kinda listen to while I stare at my phone?
I always carry a lighter in case I end up at an impromptu concert...or need to set someone`s house on fire. Either way, I`m prepared.
If there is one-thing in this would i don`t like being thought is ... a lesson.
My husband woke up this morning with a HUGE smile on his face. I love Sharpie markers.
The trick to falling asleep is putting your phone down. Unfortunately, that`s not a risk I`m willing to take.
Look, all I`m saying is that the dinosaurs didn`t drink alcohol and look what happened to them.
I am surprised Cheech and Chong have not filmed a new movie -"Cheech and Chong Smoke Colorado"
I burn bridges to keep those crazy bastards from following me.
My son got one of those `Stop Bullying` wristbands. he took it away from a fat little ginger kid.
I don`t know what`s longer, a treadmill minute or a microwave minute.
If a lesbian c*ckblocks another lesbian, is that considered a beaver dam?
I swear, if one more person calls me an alcoholic they are getting a high five too.
I pretend my bruises are sex bruises instead of I tripped over my cat while trying a new dance move bruises.
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
I was wondering why some couples don`t go to the gym together but I guess some relationships just don`t work out...