Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
one of the Olsen twins got married earlier today! when the fiance was asked "which one???" he replied "who cares???"
I`ve been spending so much time on Facebook, that I forgot the internet has porn.
What can I do today that is only going to happen once in a blue moon?
Remember, laughter is the best medicine. Unless you have diarrea.
My life is like a romantic comedy except there’s no romance and its just me laughing at my own jokes.
Whenever there’s an awkward silence, try whispering, “Did you forget your line?”
Let me just flip this here omelette.... aaaaaand I`m having scrambled eegs
How to tell if your wife is mad at you - Step 1. She is
Tomorrow is Valentines day, a holiday that comes along once a year to remind you that if you don`t have a special someone...I guess your alone.
That awkward moment when you tell your parents something funny, but it turns into a life lesson.
How did anybody express anger before the invention of the caps lock key?
I think it`s about time Taylor Swift wrote a song called "Maybe I`m the Problem"
Is it bad when I’m talking to myself and I’m not even listening?
Pro Tip: If you knock on the door to a bathroom stall and someone says "one second," wait more than one second before entering.
To be clever can be difficult without caffiene.