Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m not sure if I actually have free time or there are things I`m forgetting to do.
I`ve disappointed a lot of people in my life, you`re not special.
Ladies: We leave the toilet seat up because we don`t want to touch it any more than you do.
You can be like "This is a slippery slope" or you can be like "Weeeeeeee!"
I got drunk last night and my house wasn`t where I left it.
Pac-Man taught me that you can eat ghosts if you take enough pills.
My friends and I played fantasy football in high-school. No league, we just constantly thought about the cheerleaders.
If I had a dollar for everytime I was distracted, look squirrel!
is in his own little world but it´s okay they know me here.
My boyfriend is being so nice to me since I showed him how easy it was to remove blood from carpeting...
I`ve never done any mistake twice... three, four times may be!
I was going to change my profile pic to a pumpkin for Halloween, but it didn`t look that much different from my actual head.
You want to see Americans become activists? Cancel a TV show they like.
Send me one more game request and I`m showing up at your house drunk, at 4am, naked and demanding a game of Twister
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at him.