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Life is basically trying to meet better people than the ones you currently know.
Every-time I run I hear Mario Brothers theme song in my head, and look for things to jump over.
Admit it, you should be doing something else really important right now but your on Facebook again.
If Trump wins I`m leaving the country. If Hillary wins I`m leaving the country. This is not a political post, I just want to go on vacation.
GF: "You`re cute when you`re drunk" Me: "You`re cute when I`m drunk too"
There`s no use worrying about things you can`t control. Except for bodily functions...Hopefully you can control THEM. :/
Make Monday More Fun: Unplug the copier at work and put a sign on it that says “Now Voice Activated!” Sit back and watch the magic unfold..
When I was a kid, my parents told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, this is called "Identity Theft".
Just so you know, when you repeat what you just said I won`t be listening then either.
Eww!!! Beer does NOT taste good on Cocoa Puffs! ..I`m switching back to my Fruit Loops! ;)
I don`t gamble. I don’t drink. My one vice is my iPhone. Well, that and lying about drinking and gambling.
"Be strong" I whisper to my coffee.
If your girlfriends cat gets eaten by an angry pitbul terrier, gently singing "The circle of life" into her ear WILL NOT cheer her up.
I was thinking about jumping on the Patriot`s Fan bandwagon, but I am afraid that the tires would be deflated...
I like to start my day by taking a shower, having some coffee and going online for 14-16 hours.