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There is a fine line between a sleepover and just drinking way too much at someone else`s house.
I think the next Star Wars movie should go Country! I would be excited to see Garth Vader.........
Sometimes when i`m following a recipe and it says to bake at 350 degrees, I will turn it up to 355 just to be a rebel.
Fun thing to do: Go to a parking lot and put sticky notes on peoples cars saying "sorry for the damage" and watch them look for it
Attention idiots: as you continue to read something clearly addressed to idiots. Idiot.
I want someone to look at me the way I look at chocolate cake.
Boobs are to men what laser pointers are to cats
One of my female friend is reading a book called "Learn to drive in a week" for the last 3 years.
I really want to see you tonight. So could you please leave the blinds up and the curtains open?
I like to think outside the quadrilateral parallelogram.
no..i am not drunk, floors needs hugs too ! :p
A woman saying "I`m not mad at you" is like a dentist saying "You won`t feel a thing."
"Shit ton" is my favorite unit of measurement.
Intelligence is like underwear. It`s important that you have it but there`s no need to show it off.
Whoever said you can’t “like” your own status is just not awesome enough to do it.