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Eventually I will find Bigfoot and he will tell me all he knows about Hide & Seek.
When you called me a b*tch, did you mean it as an insult or a compliment?
The word "Lovers" bums me out unless it`s between the words "Meat" and "Pizza".
Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.
this guy with binoculars has been watching me watch him with binoculars and i don`t know who`s winning
Holding my breath until someone likes this status.
The ultimate home security system is having crappy stuff.
In terms of procrastination, I`ve had a very productive day.
The best thing about smartphones is that you don`t have to refold maps anymore.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
Insomnia improves your math skills. You spend all night calculating how much sleep you`ll get if you "fall asleep right now".
Why is it that people who drink energy drinks seem like the people with the least amount of sh!t going on?
I wonder if monsters ever get scared that we might be hiding under their bed?
When I say I can cook, I mean I can melt cheese on stuff.
If I lived everyday like it was my last, the body count would be staggering.