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I love the show Gotham....OBSESSED!!! But they constantly have the Twitter hashtag #gotham in the corner of the screen, and I`m always thinking..."No I don`t have ham! But I want ham." Sometimes I miss parts of the showing thinking about the fact that I don`t have ham..... Obviously I need to have ham on the menu every Monday night. #noidontgotham
I just burned 1200 calories ... I forgot the pizza in the oven again.
I wish Tony the Tiger would burst into a raisin commercial and yell β€œThey’re graaaapes!”
I order all my food with extra gluten.
They say you`re not supposed to go to the grocery store when you`re hungry. It`s been several days now, what should I do?
There is no better sunscreen than sitting inside a bar.
I should win an Oscar for acting like I`m busy at work.
Use a mirror and you will find, PI.E = 3.14
You know its going to be a b!tch of a day when you put your bra on backwards and it fits better.
The hardest part about having a vivid imagination is finding enough things to climb on to avoid all the frickin’ lava on the floor!
Anybody else have those FB friends that set up a FB account 4 years ago and posted once or twice and hasn`t been back on since? And you wonder how they can exist without a Life?
My body is by no means a temple but it can be one heck of a amusement park ride...
It would be great if there was an app that deletes your phone number from other people`s phones.
If you forget your hook-up’s name, just take them to Starbuck’s in the morning.
Pee your name in the snow and you`ll quickly understand why they should teach cursive in our schools.