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You know you`ve won the argument when the other person responds with "Whatever..."
"Love is all we need."-Said a wise man 40 years ago. He obviously has never had a computer
Consumer confidence is at an all time high, and so am I.
A psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
I dated this musician who used to play songs for me over the phone. Then I realized he was just putting me on hold.
Bitch, you`re just like monday, nobody likes you -_-
I found that 99% of the time, when I`m not listening, just saying "that`s some bullshi*t" makes them happy.
You don`t even want to know the things I have done for a Klondike Bar...
Newton`s third law of emotion. For every male action there is a female overreaction.
Netflix basically has every movie, except for the ones I actually want to watch.
I accidentally opened the fitness app on my phone for the first time ever. It just began pointing at me & laughing.
FOR SALE: P90X® home fitness kit, still in box, $50 or will trade for king size Snickers
A book fell on my head, I can only blame my shelf.
You know a woman really loves you when she vandalizes your car after an argument.
Showed the kids here how to eat corn-on-the-cob typewriter style........ Now explaining typewriter.