Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

The sexiest fantasy in 50 Shades Of Grey is the bit where she gets a job in journalism without having to do years of unpaid work experience.
Wishing you a fabulous 2014 that is full of great achievements and experiences. A meaningful chapter waiting to be written HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Coffee : Starter fluid for the morning impaired.
I hate sharing popcorn with someone at the cinema and our fingers touch. Especially if I don`t know them, and they don`t know we`re sharing.
If you have attention deficit disorder, throwing boomerangs isn`t for you.
Don`t judge. Maybe I`m conducting a study of the effects of prolonged laziness on a human body. You don`t know.
I just don`t want to look back and think "I could`ve eaten that"
Does anyone else make transformer noises when changing sex positions? Asking for a friend.
It only takes one slow walking person in the grocery store to destoroy the illusion that I am a nice person.
My favorite sexual position is pretty much any of them. I`m just glad to be involved.
My girlfriend called me lazy the other day. I almost responded.
The wet spot in my bed is tears
I`m smiling ... You should be scared.
Moral compass? Is there an app for that?
Ever wish the choice you made and the β€œright thing to do” were the same thing?