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When someone is in a bad mood, I like to help matters by pointing out several times that they seem to be in a bad mood.
if you hold a dinner fork really close to your eyes, you can pretend that they`re in jail
A Girl Scout made headlines when she sold cookies outside a Colorado pot shop. There’s no word on how she plans to spend her first million.
if the shoe fits wear it , if it too tight take it off
The ultimate act of trust is buying your spouse a gun, and then showing them the correct way to use it.
Heard you like bad boys .... Well, I`m not trying to impress you or anything, but when Disney Channel asked me to go to their website with my parents permission, I didn`t ask my parents.
thinks that decaffeinated coffee is just useless brown water.
Does anyone have a good recipe for homemade gasoline?
I`ll go to great lengths to scavenge other devices for batteries, before I will go out to buy new ones
You say illegal, I say added to my bucket list.
Girls, dont read this please: Hey guys, isn`t it funny how our wives/or girlfirends really think that we care what they did that day? lol.....it never gets old.
When I rule the world, it will be illegal to have an opinion until you`ve proven that you are not an idiot.
Never argue with someone who knows fancier words than you. Like `responsibility`
Whoever said paper beats rock is an idiot. Next time that happens, I`m gonna throw a rock at them while they hold up a sheet of paper.
You ever notice “q”, “p”, “b” and “d” is the same letter but with a different angle.