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If my calculations are correct then someone else did them for me.
I hate when I wake up in the middle of the night to get a quick drink of water and then accidentally eat a whole pizza and a cheesecake.
Redneck Word : debate...i was gonna go fishin today but forgot to bring debate
There may be no excuse for laziness, but I’m still looking.
Facebook is the best place to say whatever you want. If it doesn’t go over well you can just say you were hacked.
How many different animals did we have to jump on the backs of before we discovered horses were cool with it?
Sometimes after a nap, I like to take another nap.
Stop complaining about being single on Valentine`s Day. We have bigger problems in this world. Like why McDonald`s doesn`t serve breakfast after 10.30
I went to my local shop for a paper the other day. A guy out of no where started to throw eggs, cream and milk at me. I thought to myself how dairy?
Until today, I thought American Horror Story was a book about marriage.
Has anyone seen where I put my organizational skills?
I`m going to be the first person to land on the sun! I know what your thinking and thats why I will be going at night.
They say a dog can retrieve a tennis ball from over a mile away. Seems a bit far fetched to me.
Why must I prove I`m me, if I`m callin to pay my bill. Do strangers call to pay my bills? If they do, then let them, you idiots!
Kid`s Choice Awards are a great reminder why children aren`t allowed to vote.