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If it weren`t for WebMD I would have never known what symptoms to mimic so I could get all these prescriptions from my doctor.
Picking out the right Christmas tree is a science. Sneaking into your neighbor`s yard to cut it down is an art.
I thought about going outside and doing something today but my Wi-Fi really doesn`t reach very far.
Don`t exercise ... fat people are harder to kidnap
A new study has found that women find it seven times easier to read men’s facial expressions than men have reading women’s. That’s mostly because we’re not looking at their faces ...
I can buy my own sugar. What I need is an insurance daddy.
I´m on a whisky diet. I´ve lost three days already!
I`m not saying we should kill all the incompetent people. I`m simply suggesting we remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.
I can`t believe we made a movie that is essentially giving the apes a blueprint on how to take over the Earth.
Smile, it´s the second best thing you can do with your lips.
Life Tip: Hang out with people who make you forget to look at your phone.
I`ve seen people tear a phone book in half with their bare hands & I just had to use scissors to open a bagged salad.
Its so cold out, I actually saw a gangsta with his pants UP!
There`s a Bullying Support Group meeting, tomorrow night at 8 ... You`d better f*cking be there.
Several years ago Facebook came in to our lives forever changing our ability to judge each other from our couches.