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I`m not bothered if someone likes me or Not. Even Angels are hated by Demons.
I`ve been struggling with my laziness. I can`t decide if I should sit down and do nothing or lie down and do nothing.
Apparently not checking the mail is not a valid excuse for not paying your bills. The more you know.
WARNING!! I have character defects and I`m not afraid to use them.
Me: "I want to travel more." Bank account: "Like, to the park?"
Life would be more simple if the person who named the orange an orange would have named more things. ;) Just Sayin`
There`s no mirrors in this self checkout?!?
It`s a beautiful day. I think I`ll skip my meds and stir things up a bit
Abbreviation is an unnecessarily long word.
That feeling you get when you meet someone named dick....
You’ll never be as young as you are now.
All you need is WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn`t move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn`t, use the tape.
If you ever feel unattractive, just remember that you look like your ancestors, and Hey, All of them got laid.
They called themselves geologists because stoners was already taken.
One of the biggest decisions when you go to college is whether to join a fraternity or just be an asshole on your own.