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Ever work out and think "wow I really needed that"? That`s how I feel about the chocolate chip cookie I just ate.
Whenever someone tries to get too friendly with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to remind them of where we stand.
Never confuse the words "venom" and "poison". Venom is injected into blood by an animal. Poison is injected into food by a woman.
That son of a b*tch moment when you`re walking around the house with socks on and step on a random wet spot.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tire.
I`m a beer enthusiast. The more beer I drink, the more enthusiastic I become.
This post is just for you.
Where there`s a will I want to be in it
I think I`ve finally found someone I could spend the rest of my life with, I should probably get out of her closet and introduce myself.
It’s never too late for a coffee. After all it’s always morning somewhere in the world.
If any of you ladies want pancakes for breakfast, just come over....you can make them here, because I want some too
It’s not real love unless you leave your phone in plain sight overnight.
My neighbors listen to some amazing music… whether they like it or not. ;)
Nothing says lazy like laying on the couch making today`s responsibilities tomorrow`s problem.
I just fell down the stairs holding a guitar and accidentally wrote a One Direction song.