Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m terribly sorry but I have decided not to grow up and act my age after all. So there.
I`m starting to think all that stuff about Y2K is not going to happen !
I`d be willing to sleep my way to the top if it actually meant sleeping.
So what if Jesus turned water into wine... I turned a whole student loan into beer once. your move Jesus.
Despite the old saying, "Don`t take your troubles to bed," many women still sleep with their husbands.
Today is International Women’s Day. It was actually supposed to be held 2 days ago but they took too long to get ready.
WEB MD should have a simple answer like “Calm down-you probably just ate too many cookies!”
Rappers seem to have an unhealthy interest in female dogs, don`t they?
You don`t know laziness until you rob a bank & choose to wait for the amount you stole to be announced on news rather than count it yourself
The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself"...and spiders. Oh, and ticks and nuclear war and getting laid off and losing your eye sight and...
I hate it when I think I`m buying organic vegetables and I get home to discover they`re just regular doughnuts.
The hay in baby Jesus`s manger came from Christian Bales.
If tomatoes are a fruit, then ketchup is a smoothie.
The realization that Netflix knows me better than my closest friends....
There is no time to check time