Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I was pretty sure that at this point in my career I would have henchmen by now!
If I pay $30 for a haunted house I better die.
I may be crazy, but crazy is better than stupid.
I tend to say “I dont know” when I’m too lazy to think.
There`s no easy way to tell someone you lost their kid in a high stakes game of duck duck goose.
No one is as ugly as their driver`s license, and nobody is attractive as their profile picture.
I feel like Frosted Flakes gives kids an unreasonable expectation of how friendly tigers are when you try to feed them a bowl of cereal.
Obesity: When you buy a hula-hoop and it fits you.
Things I do everyday: 1.Get up 2.Survive 3.Go back to bed
Hey,,,, I said I`d be there in 10 minutes... Quit calling me every half hour.
Wives give sound advice. 99% sound, 1% advice.
When you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
Long story short, I love summaries
Great friends never let you do stupid things......alone
When in doubt, read Facebook Statuses, you`ll see you`re not the only crazy one around