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If you cry loudly enough at a Walmart everyone will just assume you work there.
"Memory foam pillow fights". That`s one fight you`ll never forget.
There is something so unique about me, that even I can`t figure it out...
Sometimes I get nervous I haven`t done anything with my life. But then something good comes on TV, and I`m OK.
I never thought I’d be the type of person who would get up early in the morning to exercise. I was right.
My pessimism has never failed me, but I`m sure someday it will.
Relax… We’re all crazy.. It’s not a competition.
Sometimes I go on Google Earth and just spin the sh!t out of the world & pretend I`m making everyone really dizzy.
I bet the first person that heard a parrot talk really lost their sh!t.
Hey people who buy bottled water for their dogs, can I have some money?
There is 2 address we will always know by heart, 1: Our Own, and 2: P. Sherman 42 wallyby way Sydney!
I’m not a sore loser ... thanks to Vicodin.
I was disappointed to learn that ‘landlady’ isn’t the opposite of a mermaid.
"It`s not about who`s right or wrong."~ The person that is wrong
Why is it Donald Duck never wore pants but always had a towel wrapped around his waist when he got out of the shower?