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Anyone else wake up in a grass skirt and coconut bra?
My last post deserves WAY more likes than that....let`s go people....chop chop!
Remember…it’s only embarrassing if you care what people think.
If you’re gonna keep being so attractive, I’m gonna need you to make out with me.
Euphoria....the feeling you get when you finally beat "that" level on Candy Crush.
I feel like I am losing my mind !!! But as long as I can keep the bit that tells me when to pee, I should be OK !!
I would like to thank you people for letting me know its Friday every week. Its thoughts like this that keep me on Facebook.
Time travel means never having to say you`re sorry...
I`m switching to Metric. I would weigh a lot less on the Metric scale.
I have heard of women that aren`t crazy, but I`ve also heard of Unicorns.
I keep a second pair of shoes at work, I don`t want people to recognize me when I`m pooping.
My body needs a refresh button.
Our kids biggest challenge will be to find a username that`s not already taken.
What do horses eat? Hay. What do gay horses eat? Haaaayyyy!
Shout out to the single lady I saw buying a bunch of Duracell batteries on Valentine`s Day.