Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Ladys have it easy, if they ever do start to loose an argument they can just start playing with their boobs
My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking. One cleaning.
They say when life gives you lemons….but what if life hands you a rather large banana? What then, my friend? What then?
I`ll be back before you can pronounce actillimandataquerin altosapaoyabayadoondib ab!
You would never know I had a college degree if you saw how many times I tried to push when it says pull.
Guys, if my hair doesn`t look like a birds nest afterward, you`re doing it wrong.
I`m gonna start a secret porn industry and call it "the Illuminaughty".
Of course size matters. No one wants a small pizza.
Helping my kid study for her geology exam, and apparently `hard` `classic` and `punk` are not the 3 different types of rock.
Don`t ya wish you could hold people up to the light like a $20 bill to tell if they`re fake or real?
Good neighbors do not put password on their wi-fi.
Just once I`d like to see a stripper do the "Carlton" on stage.
If money grew on trees, Congress would actually care about the environment.
I was trying to have a mature arguement but "look, you ignorant f*cktard" just popped out
Sometimes you just see a post and think, "Yup it`s your own fault."