Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I had s*x with my friend`s wife last night and now I feel awful. She must have had the flu or something.
Has anyone EVER checked to see how the room or wall behind them looks before taking and posting 50 selfies?!
The awkward moment when you look both ways down a one way street.
"You go girl" - asking my girlfriend to move out, but sassy like
I`m not an alcoholic I just have a lot of things to celebrate.
I can almost always tell when dinosaurs in movies aren’t real.
Big deal, Times Square, I drop the ball at least twice a week.
The best way to make a bad day better is by adding alcohol.
Objects in spandex are larger than they appear
There are 364 days till Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up. Unbelievable.
It`s that time of year again, to reflect and remember how much I love my tax deductions. Kids... I meant my kids.
Found out the difference between onions and men. I don`t cry when I`m chopping up men.
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer is my favorite story about how you will get treated like CRAP ... until you have something someone else needs
I love how television has redefined the word `marathon` to the exact opposite of physical exercise
Just realized the irony of putting Bacon on my VeggieBurger..........