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No I don`t think you`re stupid, I just think you have real bad luck when it comes to thinking
I purposely bought the same grill my neighbor has, so every time it needs to be cleaned, I just switch them at night.
Just used a full size twix bar to stir my coffee.
lol I rotfl
Everytime I find the key to happiness, somebody changes the lock.
I`m thankful for pizza and burgers... and ice cream and bacon and fries and... F*ck it, I`m thankful for food. I love you, food.
The best things in life can`t be seen or touched. At least, that`s what the restraining order says.
You know you`re old when you come close to shaving your nipple off while trying to shave your legs!
Interesting fact: Prior to the creation of hummus and ranch dressing nobody ate uncooked vegetables.
Hey whiny kids with iPhones: when I was your age, I played with a stick.
I know right from wrong. Wrong is the fun one.
I need a better plan of action when my phone rings than throwing it.
Who is the genius that decided Little League uniforms be white? My guess is Tide laundry detergent.
Every time I almost think humanity will be okay, I see someone struggle with the self-checkout for 20 minutes.
Oh really? It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown? How many muscles does it take to mind your own business