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I may look like I`m doing nothing, but in my head I`m quite busy.
I just can`t seem to get a girlfriend even though I can speak two languages fluently. English and Klingon.
Things were said. Feelings were hurt. Your car was set on fire. My point is you’re wrong & Raphael isn’t the best Ninja Turtle. Get over it.
Don’t worry I won’t tell anyone.. and if I do, I’ll tell them not to tell anyone.
"I guess you`re right." - No one on the internet ever
I want a firsthand test of the "mo money, mo problems" hypothesis.
Even if girls came with instructions, men would never read them.
I had no plans on looking sexy today, but sh!t happens.
We all have faults. It`s just that mine are better than yours.
I really hate it when I have to watch the same channel for 2 days because the remote fell behind the couch.
WOULD YOU RATHER: have six arms or giant antlers? (You don’t really get a choice; the surgeons were just sort of curious.)
If you ever think someone’s too cute to talk to just remember that they poop too.
Who is the genius that decided Little League uniforms be white? My guess is Tide laundry detergent.
You may think I`m a loser, but to my goldfish, I`m the god of flakes.
Men use love to get sex. Women use sex to get love. I use coupons to get pizza.