Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
America: Where stairs are only used for emergency escape purposes.
You guys can laugh at my cargo pants all you want, but I just walked out of Taco Bell with 350 sauce packets.
Can`t dance? Spell your name....in the air...with your butt. BOOM! Next problem...
I love tan lines... it`s like God came down and high-lighted all the good parts... ;-)
Not to cause a panic but i`m starting to think we`re running out of things to stuff inside pizza crust.
Men hang out in bars for one of two reasons: Either they have no wife to go home to, or they do
"I am upping my standards... so up yours!"
Who let the owls out?? Don`t sing the chorus you`ll make it worse.
Some of the best moments in life are the ones you can’t tell anyone about.
Before Walmart, you had to buy a ticket to the fair to see a bearded woman.
I`m single by choice. Not MY choice. But it`s still a choice
its not the up`s and down`s that bring you down...its the jerks!!
I wish Monday was a figment of my imagination.
People who say "I hate to bother you" need to learn to hate it a little bit more.
Does this floor I’m laying on make me look unmotivated?