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When`s it gonna be the 4th of July? I feel like blowin somethin` up and not gettin` arrested.
If other employees are taking four fifteen minutes smoke breaks a day, I should most certainly be allowed a one hour nap time.
Growing up is when you go from using drugs for fun to using drugs for survival.
I think every Taco Bell value meal should be called a "Number 2".
I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.
I ran into a dwarfs car this morning and he come up to me and said "I`m not happy!" And I said we`ll which one are you then
Don’t get me wrong. I totally hear what you’re saying…I just don’t care.
What Flickering Lights Mean: 1% Electrical problems 99% demons and sh!t.
Sometimes one middle finger isn`t enough to let someone know how you feel. That`s why we have two hands.
Zoning out is your brain’s way of saying “You look bored. Let me take you to a better place.”
Actions speak louder than passive aggressive Facebook statuses.
i wasnt tht drunk u was holding a ballon thinking it was a comdom
Pandora has taught me that a lot of the music I love is very similar to music I absolutely hate
Ok everyone enough of your "family" time, come back to the internet. We are your real family.
When ever I think about the past...It brings back so many memories