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All sex is safe sex if you keep your bright orange reflective vest on.
Fun things to do in Walmart: Take the ``try me`` stickers off of the toys & place them on condom boxes.
The older I get .... The more dangerous it is to sneeze
The worst thing about renting movie from a Red Box is that a $1 late fee isn’t enough motivation to get off the couch.
If someone says "I`m a sub-par golfer" does that mean they`re good at golf, or bad?
This is my first status of 2017. Yeah, I thought it would be better too.
There are four main food groups: 1. Canned 2. Frozen 3. Fried 4. Drive-thru
Dear Kelloggs, Cereal that makes them go back to sleep. Sincerely, Tired parents
Of course size matters. No one wants a small pizza.
"It gotten SOOO cold in D.C., politicians have their hands in their OWN pockets!"
Where is the "Made In China" labels made?
I hate it when people upload song lyrics as their status`s it reminds me of somebody i used to know
Yes, that`s correct. And the horse you rode in on.
Youth is wasted on the young.
My bedroom is perfect for a one night stand, but there’s no room for two night stands.