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So if one was to type ‘idiot’ into Google, would your picture come up?
"Everyone give us money in case something happens and when something happens we`ll call you a liar." -insurance
FYI : My post aren`t directed at anyone in particular...so should anyone be offended by them, I say if the shoe fits ... Wear It!!!!!
Doctors and scientists agree on the benefits of an afternoon nap, yet still my boss thinks he knows better. Ridiculous.
Let`s go to my place and do the things I`ll tell everyone we did anyway.
Just ONCE, I`d like to look deep into your beautiful eyes, and make hot sweet love with you without some pop-up window ruining the mood.
The only way I want to see your ultrasound picture is if you`re having a velociraptor.
Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.
I found out last night that the only thing worse than waking up 3 times to pee is sleeping right through it.
My safe word is "Make sure we don`t go over the hour. That`s all the cash I got on me."
Smile. Your enemies hate it.
People be like… I will love you unconditionally on one condition.
I laugh in the face of normal.
Some of my friendships are bad for my liver.
My doctor said I need to drink more water every day, so I have started putting ice cubes in my vodka.