Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Today`s big idea - Coffee eye drops
Everyone around me keeps telling me I`m mean ... Which is absurd ... Plus, they`re ugly.
*Me washing my car* Person: Hey what’s up? Washing your car? Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.
Can anyone recommend a good movie to kinda listen to while I stare at my phone?
If you workout and don`t post a status about it on Facebook, do you still lose weight?
My New Year`s resolution is to stop pointing my car alarm remote at my apartment front door expecting to unlock it
Missed the gym yesterday.... That makes 11 years in a row.
Bored? Find group photo of 4 women. Comment "You 3 look incredible!!"
The grass was greener on the other side, so we smoked it.
Actually, I prefer to smile on the `inside`, then no one knows what you`re up to....
Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that made you smile ?
i hope your life is as long and useful as this roll of toilet paper!!!
me + you = overpopulation... :) :p
Whenever I try cleaning my room I either end up making a bigger mess, or just playing with the stuff I thought I lost.
Right now my glass is half empty...Hey Bartender!!!