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Marco Polo must really hate sitting near a swimming pool.
I hate it when a website greets me with a pop-up window. It just feels like you should say hi first, maybe buy me a drink.
Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark
Just remember, If we get caught you`re deaf and I don`t speak English.
Game of Thrones characters should have to wear jerseys with their names on the back
Thanks to the popularity of gifs, we are living in the golden age of silent films.
The party`s not over `till you smile for the mugshot
"That looks interesting. I think I`ll eat it." - Sharks and Toddlers
If I ever start a band, I`m going to call it The Voices in My Head. Think of all the fun ways you can tell other people what you`re listening to...
I bought the world`s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it`s terrible.
How can society expect me to be a mature productive member of it I don`t even know if it`s spelled gray or grey
Do you ever walk out of a bathroom and want to put a sign on the door that says "I was just peeing It smelled that way when I went in there"
Before Walmart you had to buy a ticket to the fair to see a bearded lady!
Square box. Round pizza. Triangle slices. I`m Confused.