Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If you`re single and you know it hug your cat!
This bulk box of peanuts I got from Costco tastes like styrofoam.
On average I spend $75 a year to watch bananas turn brown.
My bank is the worst. They`re charging me money for not having enough money in my account. Apparently, I can`t even afford to be broke.
Sometimes my kid likes me, but I`m pretty sure it`s only because I`m his Oreo dealer.
Maybe America will believe in global warming if we make it a Snapple Fact.
No one`s going to do it for you. It`s up to you, to make naps a priority in your life.
Libraries were a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn`t be allowed to talk
I need to start setting an alarm to go to bed.
Hey babe, go to Google Earth, zoom in on your house. See that blue cap in the bushes? Hi!
I dont care how you live your life, so just let me live mine. Yeah whatever.
I want my children to have all the things I never had so then I can move in with them.
A stress ball, made of concrete, and to throw at the person who`s stressing you out.
The Family Reunion went pretty good until they all figured out that I wasn`t related to any of them
My local news station says it gives us " news when it breaks " ...I want unbroken news!!