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Facebook is like Chinese food. When you think you had enough, you want more.
I don`t have any "driving the speed limit" music.
Hell is an endless cycle of getting comfortable in bed & then suddenly having to pee.
Ha = I didn`t find that funny. Haha = That was funny. Hahahahaha = I want to sleep with you.
Adding lyrics when you don`t know the words or making words up when you don`t speak the language. ;)
The only time I`ve ever had a chip on my shoulder was when I tried to dump the entire bag into my mouth at once.
He is proud of himself. He finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years.
Pinatas are a great way to teach children that if you repeatedly beat something with a stick, eventually you`ll get what you want.
She likes to call it a conversation, but mostly she`s gathering evidence.
I bet when Cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one goes, β€œMan, you’re such a Cheetah!” and they laugh & eat a zebra or whatever.
It may appear like I`m doing nothing, but i`m actively waiting for my problems to go away!!!
Well if you didn`t want me to fall in love with you, why did you tell me you had nachos?
If ghosts existed, why are they all apparently from the last 100 years or so? Wouldn’t there be evidence of a Neanderthal ghost here and there?
I need a new bad decision.
Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be totally impossible!