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I can`t tell them apart, was that Milli or Vanilli doing the sign language at Madela`s funeral?
SINGLE GUYS: Nervous about flirting with a woman? Just remember: they`re smart, confident, and aware they don`t need us, so yeah, you should be worried.
Karma is like a rubber-band: it can only stretch so far before it comes back and smacks you in the face.
The closer you are to the toilet, the harder it is to hold it in.
I won`t be impressed with technology until I can download food.
Your family tree must look like a cactus........everybody on it is a pr!ck
I relate to Game of Thrones because much like my own life, I have no idea what’s going on and there’s a lot of wine drinking.
When I said I missed you, I meant with a hammer.
1 in 3 Americans, weighs as much as the other 2.
During a test..people look up for inspiration, down in desperation, and left and right for information
Listening to the voices in my head, I’ve concluded that they’re having more fun than me.
Are there actually people who get out of the shower to pee? I want to meet them.
"Don`t try this at home"...Okay, i`ll try it at my friend`s house..
A company has announced a new service where you carpool with strangers. It`s a new cutting-edge technology called "taking the bus."
Wonders why there´s an ice cream truck for kids but not a frozen Margaurita truck for adults?