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Years ago, my girlfriend said, “It’s me or the beer!” I wonder how she doing…
We laughed, we cried, we tried another credit card.
I`ve been told my posts are too depressing but what does it matter. We`ll all be dead soon anyway.
My friend wants to know if you think I’m hot.
Always wonder why do people even bother making good quality pinatas?
can say whatever the hell I want as my Facebook Status, and nobody will be offended as long as I smile at the end. Example: I hate everybody today :) - LOL
The longest 10 seconds of my day is when I have to hold down the button on an electronic thing to turn it off
The average human uses less than 10 percent of the remote.
My kids are giving all the people on this airplane a hard lesson in birth control right now.
In order for three people to keep a secret, two must be dead!
Apparently "whiskey and wild women" is not an acceptable answer when asked what your weaknesses are during a job interview.
Based on the number of smoke breaks they take, I’m pretty sure the only reason my co-workers have a job is to pay for their cigarettes.
When I said I like it rough I was talking about the sex, not the whole entire relationship...
How long does it take to get obsessed?
Elevator music bothers me on so many levels