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Oh the pranks I would pull if I were invisible
I don`t have an inner child. I have an inner old person who wants everyone to shut up.
Basically the way it works is I tell myself I`m not going to eat too much and then I eat too much.
when is humpty dumpty going to hatch?
Damn…I’m having an out of money experience.
One day you will die, but every other day you won’t. So that’s pretty great, right? ... Inspirational posts are hard.
Just saw 2 homeless guys hitting eachother with cardboard... PILLOW FIGHT!
I was standing in front of the mirror earlier, admiring my six pack for hours. But it got really warm so I put it back in the fridge.
Today is opposite day. Wait...if today is opposite day and I say that it is opposite day that means today isn`t opposite day. If it isn`t opposite day then how cAn I say today is opposite dAy? I`m so confused -.-
Today is National animals day, please take a moment to remember your ex :p:p:p.
Digging through a box in the closet and I found a picture of me sitting on Santa`s lap. Hard to believe that was almost 2 years ago.
My therapist recommended I quit growling at people...
Spent 40 minutes on the treadmill this morning. Next time I might turn it on.
Alcohol may not be able to give you a loving hug when you need it but the Liquor Mart employee`s you`re buying it off of sure can.
I found a penny today that reminded me of you. Totally worthless and always in a stranger`s pants.