Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I don`t know what`s scarier. Houses with Halloween decorations or houses that still have up Christmas decorations from last year.
You guys are even more beautiful now that I`m wearing my "wine glasses".
I hate the snow so much, I want to build a snowman just so I can punch it in its face.
"Memory foam pillow fights". That`s one fight you`ll never forget.
Why do cops ask us why we think they pulled us over? It`s their job. I dont go to the station and ask why they think I created a powerpoint.
OMG! I went shopping because I needed a skirt and these earings were on special so I bought four new pairs of shoes!
Sometimes, I wonder if the weather app on my phone even looks outside.
I hate when the cops throw me in the back of the squad car like they didn’t hear me call shotgun.
You call it Sushi, I call it bait.
When life gives you lemons....throw them back and yell, "I wanted cookies!"
Can you imagine if Facebook and Twitter just decided to shut down and you see all these confused people coming out of their house squinting at the sun.
You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn`t come back, what you`ve lost is a normal pigeon.
Women.Some men undermine, disrespect and consider them weak,forgeting the countless spanks they got from their mothers
Whoever said “There is nothing as precious as a child’s laughter” obviously never fell down a flight of stairs in front of his kids.
I wish "You idiot" was an appropriate way to end a work email.