Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If I told you I was a pathological liar, would you believe me?
My son asked what it is like to be married, so I deleted all the music on his ipod except 1 song.
Never realized how out of shape I was until I started sweating after using scissors for 30 seconds.
Couples Halloween costumes always end up looking like one person went along with it to save the relationship.
My exercise routine consists of doing diddly squats.
1st thing I do after great sex! Turn the alarm clock off.........
Whenever I delete an App on my iPhone, The shaking icons make me feel like they`re all panicked over who`s getting deleted.
Sometimes a special someone walks right into your life and helps you realize how much better your life was before they walked into it.
If you forget your hook-up’s name, just take them to Starbuck’s in the morning.
In Canada, she`s Kilometery Cyrus.
I wish people`s voices actually sounded the way they do when their spouse or partner imitates them during an argument.
One day, long, long ago, there lived a woman who did not whine, nag, or complain. But it was a long time ago, and it was just for that one day.
Ban pre-shredded cheese! Make America grate again.
Maybe don`t show me a picture if you don`t want me to rate your baby.
Its almost that time again! That`s right, its holiday season! Merry Black Friday sales, and happy spending!