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Was sitting and doing nothing. Then I realized I could be sitting and doing nothing on Facebook. So here I am.
Our parents always taught us NOT to write on walls... Facebook teaches us differently
Men use love to get sex...women use sex to get love...I use coupons to get pizza!
You make me have filthy thoughts, and for that I thank you...
does anyone know if smurfs are gluten free
I’m sad when my food is over.
50 notifications later I regret ever commenting on your status.
Some days your the duck. Some days your the goose.
My wife woke up with a HUGE smile on her face this morning. I love sharpies.
"American Pie" ruined it for any kid that actually does have an amazing story from band camp.
If it lasts 4 hours I`m not only callin a Dr, I`m callin everybody!!
I don’t care what women say, size matters in bed. The bigger the bed the more room you have to move around.
Who can really hear themselves thinking?
Its Friday ... my body is in for a much-needed drinking session
After socializing and being nice to people all day it`s nice to sit down, drink by myself, and be an a$$hole on the Internet.