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whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
Do you ever think that if it weren`t for someone smoking Marijuana they might of killed you already. . .
Parallel lines have so much in common, it`s a shame they`ll never meet
Pretending to be a morning person is exhausting.
It only takes 2 ingredients to make a baby. Does that not blow your mind. Like at least there should be some flour or something.
We`re up to Fast n Furious #6. Shouldn`t they just create a weekly TV series?
The problem with plants is that you have to water them… like more than once apparently.
If your girl sets her Facebook relationship status to “Widowed”, it’s time to pack a suitcase as fast as possible.
God made men. But sandwiches weren`t going to make themselves. So God made women.
Just think of how different the world would be if Noah had eaten those two chickens.
If you`re having second thoughts, you`re 2 ahead of most people.
Facebook: A place where people, who know so little about anything, have so much to say about everything.
When I was a kid, I told my parents I was going to make something of myself. I think they are getting impatient.
Farts are like children. I`m proud of mine and disgusted by yours.
Just tried to kill a snake in the backyard. And by kill I mean screaming as loudly as a human can in an attempt to make its head explode.