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Just so you know, the movie "Life of Pi" has nothing to do with dessert.
I`m sure the fellow below don`t have big feet :(
Did you know that if you put a finger in your ear and scratch, it sounds like Pacman.
Woke up this morning with a HUGE smile on my face....damn kids and thier sharpies.
My co workers put cookies on my desk, like they`re leaving a sacrifice for an angry god.
Now that I`m turning 40, I need to be careful about what I eat and drink and make sure I am getting my nutrients. That is why I just added pulp-free Orange Juice to my Vodka.
Q: What do you call apple-flavoured marijuana? A: iPot
Who needs the weather network when you have Facebook.
This stupid lady is taking forever using her damn coupons for her groceries. All these rolls of pennies are heavy! Hurry up!
I swear, if one more person calls me an alcoholic they are getting a high five too.
If I was stuck on a desert island with only one record, I would want it to be the record for being able to swim the farthest.
Wanted a nap but had trouble getting to sleep. So I put on Seeking a Friend for the End of the World. Now 13 hours later, I`m well rested.
I hate it when I fill my blowup doll with helium and then she plays hard to get...
Wanna have a little fun? Post "Anyone know a good lawyer?" Then sit back and watch the speculation run wild!
When someone tells you they`re playing a STD game... But you later realise they were talking about Spot The Difference.