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Teamwork is just another way of saying we will soon be sharing in the blame equally.
That awkward moment when you give the same Hallmark card two years in a row.
Turns out that my get rich painfully slow scheme isn`t working out either.
Is glad Christmas is near i sure need new coloring books and crayons ..
My RSVP : I`ll be attending your wedding alone but consuming enough cake and alcohol for at least two.
I wake up every morning with the joy & excitement of wanting to go directly back to sleep.
If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.
Ah man... i don`t have any notifications... better go check another computer
I hate people that take drugs, specially U.S. Customs and the D.E.A.
A date with Destiny.. Cause strippers need lovin` too.
Nice try horror movies, but everyone in my generation is already terrified to answer their phones
Serious question: Are doctors sure erectile dysfunction isn`t just a side effect of being married & bangin the same woman for years & years?
Saying "cool" also means, I don`t give a sh!t.
What is depression? Depression is when you buy a new hula-hoop and it fits you.
First Ebola case in USA , and the Walking Dead starts next week... brb gonna go buy a crossbow.