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Hump Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There may be no excuse for laziness, but Iām still looking.
My girlfriend told me that Iām starting to annoy her because I relate everything to batman ... What a Joker...
I think you and I both know that you`re not facebook friends with me for the funny statuses.
Relationship status: If I slam on my brakes really hard... The seatbelt hugs me back.
You laugh because I`m different ........... I laugh because I farted.
The Zoo is a safe place to fart.
My idea of getting lucky is having someone else do the laundry.
I don`t wanna be told what to do unless I`m naked
Mac & Cheese doesn`t contain many vitamins, so it`s important you always eat a bunch of it.
Mom in poetic mood ....Asked me to express emptiness .... I showed her my wallet ........ n m cheek still burns .... :-p :-p
If you put Root Beer in a square glass do you get Beer?
I haven`t seen any new episodes of Gilligan`s Island in awhile... I hope they`re OK.
Strange new trend at work. People putting names on food in the company fridge. Yesterday I ate a tuna sandwich named Jennifer.
My box of Animal Crackers said, "WARNING: Do Not Eat if Seal is Broken." I open the box, and sure enough...