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I’ve made some mistakes I wish I could make again.
Whoever lost a bundle of $20 bills tied up in a rubber band..I found the rubber band..
Well today I turned 26, not because I wanted to, but only because Facebook limits how many times you can actually change your birth year !
Your french fries are just my french fries on the wrong plate.
So far my Christmas shopping has involved buying myself presents, so I`d say it`s been a success.
You`d think Pizza Hut would be able to upgrade to a house by now.
Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.
I don`t have ADHD. I have ADOLS. Attention deficit..OH LOOK! Skittles!
Fitness nuts have to do an entire marathon to feel a runner`s high..... I just have to bend over and tie my shoes.
Absolutely is my favourite nothing to do...
Apparently, "Giant ones" is not the appropriate response to the question, "What are the steps you would take in the event of an emergency?"
Due to an unforeseen error during last night`s love making session I am forced to wear non matching socks today
"Woo, I`m on a roll today, baby!" -butter
If you didn`t want me looking in your bedroom than you never should have put your window at the same height as my ladder.
The only people without problems are in the cemetery.