Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I wish I could feel as happy as an adult, as I felt as a kid when the teacher wheeled in the TV during class
I`m still waiting for that fairly tale scene where the animals clean everything for me.
Everyone has their area of expert knowledge.... if any of you need tips on how to do absolutely nothing amazingly well, let me know.
Pretending to tolerate other people is exhausting.
7 billion people on the planet and I can only tolerate maybe 10.
Now that Microsoft`s Steve Ballmer has bought the Clippers, I wonder if he will release a new version every few years that we all hate.
I should be able to take a sick day if I am sick of the people I work with.
Yes, I dance in my car. Yes, I see you staring at me. No, I do not care.
The fridge is a clear example that what matters is what`s inside.
I just saw a man salute the Budweiser truck on the highway. LMAO
Thoughts of you make my demons nervous.
I liked your facebook update, only so I can unlike it.
OMG!!!!! I almost went to the toilet without my phone!
Saw a brand new Prius totaled on my way home from work. Still had the window sticker. That would suck... Not to crash, but to drive a Prius.
Common Sense is so rare, it should be classified as a super power.