Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I wish common sense was more common.
The batteries in my electric toothbrush died before I finished. I`ve never sympathized more with women in my life.
Tis the season to throw your diet out the window.
My husband told me that he would leave me if I didn`t give up all my bad habbits.....I nearly choked on my toe nail!
Guys...dont mess up and buy her the wrong brand of vacuum cleaner for Valentines Day this year. Spend a little extra for a really good one ... Just tring to help.
I`m fat, but I blame my dog for not exercising me enough.
If you need me I`ll always be stuck behind the person who doesn`t know how to use the CVS self-checkout aisle.
I hate it when people radiotype us blondes as dumb.
Just once, I`d like to clock out from work by sliding down a dinosaur.
Hockey: because running on knives makes sense.
Walmart needs observation decks.
I wish I could understand what women with big boobs are saying.
I`m the type of person who goes out to a restaurant and orders a veggie burger with cheese and bacon on it.
"Shit ton" is my favorite unit of measurement.
How many exercise/workout videos does a person have to buy before seeing results?