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Who the hell buys a cat? There are cats everywhere just let one in your home and it becomes your cat.
I`m not as smart as I used to be but then again you can`t stay a teenager all of your life.
Is it rude to throw a breath mint in someone`s mouth while they are talking?
Why can’t the shower just naturally keep itself clean?
My son asked what it is like to be married, so I deleted all the music on his ipod except 1 song.
If you`re going to walk a mile in my shoes...Can you pick me up some beer on your way back?
My pessimism has never failed me, but I`m sure someday it will.
Whenever someone ends their status with "LOL" I know it`s a repost, cuz...who the hell laughs at their own statuses? LMAO!
It`s too bad parallel lines never meet because they have so much in common.
I wish I could smack the stupid out of people. And if you think this status is about you ... Smack yourself for me!
If a lesbian c*ckblocks another lesbian, is that considered a beaver dam?
What`s cardio, and can I eat it?
I finally did it. I gave my cat a bath today. It really wasn`t that bad. She enjoyed it. I enjoyed it. Other than the fur sticking to the roof of my mouth, it went well.
Imagine if someone`s name was Gurt. You`d be all "yo gurt!" .. funny? no? Ok (._.)
If it doesn’t involve food or sleep, I’m probably not interested.