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No thanks, alcohol free mouthwash, my life is depressing enough.
I just took a 5 hour energy and a sleeping pill...LET THE BATTLE BEGIN.
Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It`s like Facebook in real life.
FYI: Taking permanent marker and writting Aeropostale on Fruit of the Loom tee shirts will NOT fool your teenager.
The best part about living by myself is not having to explain why i fell asleep on the kitchen counter… naked… again..
Today is National I Don`t Feel Like Doing Sh!t Day. Celebrate accordingly.
Apparently, when asked "In the event of a fire, what steps would you take?" "F**kin` large ones" is not the correct answer.
If a single teacher can’t teach all the subjects then how could you expect a single student to learn all subjects.
To the person who stole my antidepressants..I hope you`re happy now!!!
This hot fudge sundae hasn`t killed me so it must be making me stronger.
People would believe everything I say.. if it wasn`t for everything I say.
I`m saving all my good posts for when I can think of some.
If you`re buying Smart Water for 4$ a bottle,, I`m sorry to tell you it`s not working
Do angry people know about naps?
Pizza doesn’t ask questions. Pizza understands.